As usual, we got into Sunday School late this morning.

The topic appears to be about animals in God's scheme of things.

If God can make a donkey speak (think democrats), does that entail that they have souls?

I propose that dogs can have a conscience, because mine acts guilty long before I see the evidence. Yet until God comes down in the form of a dog and dies in a pound for the sins of my dog, my dog may not make it into heaven.

As of right now, I'm ready to send him ahead to find out.

My dog is an escape dog.

I have a large fenced yard that is surrounded by "invisible fence" wire. Typically, he won't go near the fence because his collar zaps him, even when the kind neighbor lady offers him scraps. He has his own entry to the heated mud room where his food, water and bed are.

I take him for walks.

Every now and then I get a call from the neighboring tanning salon that they have Petey.

One day, while at work, I got a call from a neighbor that she had Petey. While talking to her, I get a second call from another neighbor saying she has Petey. Sure enough the first lady has lost him. Then I get a third call from a DPW worker saying he has my dog.

I need to check the batteries on the collar more frequently.

Yesterday, I took the collar off to check the batteries to see how he got out. That's when I found the poop smeared under her collar between the electrodes, shorting the zap out.

No poop anywhere else, just packed between the electrodes. That's a smart dog.

Should have named him Papillon.

The dog is not intimidated by a pistol pointed at it's head. You didn't hear me say that.

Today, we drove halfway across the state to meet some close friends for dinner.

Their anniversary fell on Valentine's Day this year.

Almost there, I get a call. The caller has our dog. I advise they let him go since I'm in no position to retrieve him. An hour later, another call. And as we're finishing dinner, another call. From the Humane Society.

$35 to get our dog back today. Another $25 tomorrow.

So we rush back to find out the Township has started a licensing program and our dog is not. $9 for the license if the dog is sterile, $125 if not. WHAT????

My tax dollars hard at work again.

So they'll sterilize the dog for $75 and sell us the license for $9.

Now if I shoot the dog, I'll have wasted all that money.

All the while, the Humane Society worker is offerring to take the dog off our hands.

I'm looking at a price sheet on the wall, and they charge $250 as an adoption fee for a dog. $100 for a cat! I must not take the chance of insulting one of my few readers by suggesting that it is a sign of incipient idiocy to BUY a cat. It seems to me, though that as a dog nears it's expiration date, the price should reflect that.

I'm thinking that if I surrender the dog as he wants, he'll sit in the pound til they kill him or they'll make $250 off him.

I had the same moral dilemma once before when my kids ran away from home.

My wife insisted that there was no weighing the pros and cons of my getting them.